From Frump to FabuMommy! Active Wear!

Happy Monday!  Mommy Chick and I are so excited about the fabulous weather today.  We typically go to the park on Mondays.  I'll probably try out that swing thing again today.

We like to look casual chic at the park, so we often sport active wear.  Sometimes we call it "work out wear," but that seems silly if we aren't actually sweating.

So how do you look hip rather than frump in your active wear?  I think it all comes down to footwear.  I don't personally have a lot of shoes yet, since I can't actually walk.  I mainly stick to socks.

But, you don't want to be like Britney at the Gas Station, so you need to wear shoes.  Check out this look from Lucky Brand.  And again, notice the feet.  The model is wearing yoga pants.  But, she pairs them with cute sandals and a sassy denim jacket.  You can shop this look here.  The pants are $59.50.

You can also do a legging with a cute little ballet flat, like this:

MC and I love all things sparkly.  She covets Mystique sandals.  These little flip flops will jazz up any pair of yoga pants.  They are $135.  You can order them online.  We think Neiman Marcus used to carry them in their stores, but couldn't find them on their website.  Let us know if you find them In Real Life.

That wraps up my series!  If you'd like to know more about any of our topics, leave it in the comments.  I've gotten some interesting reader mail I'll be sharing.

Two words, people:  Knee Socks.

We'll be talking about that toward the end of the week.

From Frump to FabuMommy! Our Fav Jeans

I trust that you now know whether or not you are wearing Mom Jeans.  I started to say "rocking" Mom Jeans, but realized that is an oxymoron.  Yes, I'm five months old and know some pretty big words.  Impressive for someone who poops in her pants, huh?

Here are my top three jeans for you to try.  I promise you will look hot, and who knows, maybe it will lead to yet another Monkey Baby.  Wink wink.

This is the America Eagle Outfitter Favorite Boyfriend Jean.  Mommy Chick first tried AEO jeans in 2006 after In Style Magazine raved about them.  We like...and your budget will, too, at $29.50.

We also like the Lucky Brand Lola Bootleg.  I am biased because MC tried to get Daddy Dude to name me Lola.  That was nixed, then she moved on to Harlow.  Obviously neither won, and I'm now Monkey.  Anyway, the Lola is $99.

If you feel like investing a bit more in your jeans, try Joe's Jeans Honey Cut.  MC read that Beyonce loves these, so you know they're good.  And look at that model.  She so does not look like a frump.  I dare you to stand like that on the playground.  And if you send me a picture of it, I'll find a prize for you.

Happy shopping!  Let us know how amazing you look in your new dungarees.  I'm practicing being elderly by using words like that.  Next, I'll refer to the couch as a davenport.

From Frump to FabuMommy! Dressing the Part

Are you loving my series?  I do hope you are looking more and more fabulous by the day.  If you haven't already, make sure to check out The Three Minute Face, as well as Part 1 and Part 2 of my visit from the Hair Guru.

So you are wearing appropriately glossed lips and a stylin' ponytail.  But you just ruined the whole package by putting on sweats two sizes too big!

My logic skills are not yet fully developed.  However, I do kind of follow your reasoning.  Mommy Chick is obviously trying to give me body issues already, because I overhear her telling her friends she "feels fat."  Dr. Phil says mommies should not talk about weight in front of their Bald Monkey Babies, so I hope she knocks it off before I start talking out loud.

As usual, I digress.  You "feel fat" so you try to hide it with large clothes.  Congratulations!  You just added bulk to your body!

MC used to be the Queen of Wearing Clothes Too Big For Her.  Thank goodness My Fairy Godfather pointed it out to her.  He is an Entertainment Manager at this really big park that features rodents.  He is also a Big Deal pageant/modeling coach and loves to do wardrobe consultations.  He has also danced with Christina Aguilera.  Even more impressive, he used to dance inside a Barney costume.  Knowing the inner workings of the "industry" has really robbed me of my childhood.

Here we are after a Gay Chorus concert.  MC and I don't sing.  We are not allowed. (BTW...MC is wearing the Three Minute Face here.  I am wearing The Annoyed Get Me the Heck Out of Here Face).

So here are My Fairy Godfather's Top 5 Wardrobe Commandments:

1. Wear clothes that fit and actually touch your body.
2. Remember, the size tag is on the inside, so don't worry if you don't like the number.
3. Always wear earrings.  It gives a more polished look. (You might have a Bald Monkey Baby who likes to pull earrings, so just wear studs.  That's what MC does now.)
4. Buy basic pieces and add fabulous accessories, like a cute belt or pair of leopard print shoes.
5. No Mom Jeans!

Remember, it takes the same amount of time to slide into unflattering clothes as it does to slip into something sassy!

So how do you know if you're wearing Mom Jeans?  MC and I found the most AMAZING Mom Jean tutorial.  We will share it with you tomorrow and will also tell you how to look super cute in work out wear.

From Frump to FabuMommy!

Happy Monday!  I'm celebrating the beginning of March with a series: From Frump to FabuMommy.  Way back when I lived in MC's big, round belly, I would eavesdrop on all of her conversations.  You would not believe some of the stuff I heard!  I could write several series based on that alone.


But what I really noticed is that women who already had babies on the outside would tell MC how she would stop looking fabulous after I came out.  They'd say things like:


"Enjoy going to the salon now, because you'll never go again after you have your baby."
"You'll probably cut your hair short soon because it's so much easier."
"You should try doing your own highlights because it saves time and money."


You know what I say to all of that?  It takes just as much time to look like poo as it does to look fab.   I know some of you probably don't believe me.  That's why I've interviewed a team of experts!


Coming up later today, I will tell you how to do your face in three minutes.  That's right, three minutes.  So stick your monkey in it's crate  crib and get to glossing those lips!


If you have a specific question about hair, make up or wardrobe, leave it in the comments and I'll send a Monkeygram to my experts.


See you soon.