I'm Six Months Old Today!

Happy Half Birthday to me!  Did you get me a present?  I'd really like a weave and a bit of lipgloss.  Just email me for my shipping address.

Here are some of my current interests:  blowing spit bubbles, eating my own fingers, growing teeth, squealing at my Big Brown Dog, reading about Tiger Woods scandal, and being the boss of Mommy Chick.

Here we are leaving the hospital.  I was hiding my face because all the paparazzi was in a competition to get the first photo of me.  That's my Juicy diaper bag just tossed on the bench.

And here I am just a few days ago!

In Big Six-Month Old News, I have slept all night in my own crib for the last three nights.  For my next stunt, I will drive a car and go to college.

Enjoy celebrating my Half-Birthday Weekend, everyone!

I'm Releasing Text Messages, Too!

So everyone seems to be abuzz about Tiger Wood's alleged (that's a fancy word that news people use so they won't get sued) mistress Joslyn James.  She made a website where she released purported (another "don't sue us" word) text messages from Tiger.

One of them is about him peeing on her.  I peed on Mommy Chick's Juicy robe last night, so I have no idea why that's such a big deal.  Maybe Joslyn (and MC) should learn to put the new diaper under the old one while doing a change.

Anyway, I'm hoping to increase my traffic, so I stole MC's phone and am releasing text messages from Daddy Dude.  

DD, if you are reading this, I will remove these only if you produce the Maclaren Baby Juicy Stroller by midnight Sunday.  And MC needs some Tory Burch flats for the park.  I think you'll make the right choice. (BTW, these flats are pre-order only right now)

Like Joslyn, we are omitting our response to these texts:

"About to walk out the door.  See you soon."

"It'll be 7:30 before I'm done tonight."

"How are my girls today?"

"Don't open the edamame."

"I have to run a VD errand. Be back soon."

"Did you download the gorilla video?"

"Easy with the threats."

"I was preoccupied with Ms. Thang."

Yesterday Joslyn's site crashed from so much traffic, so I apologize in advance if I crash Google with this post.  Hopefully MC and I will be at the park next week with our new loot.

Baby and Mommy Swimsuits!

I'm so annoyed.  It is cold again!  Maybe not cold to a lot of you, but I am a native Floridian, and temps in the 40's are simply unacceptable.

So Mommy Chick and I are thinking warm thoughts and planning our swimwear for spring.  We are thinking about doing a little beach weekend in April.  We haven't shared this with Daddy Dude yet, but we're sure he'll go for it.

I have a couple of options I like for myself.  Fortunately, I am long and lean so any style will work.  Did I mention I'm in the 95% for height and 50th for weight?  Put some rhinestone wings on me and call me Giselle!

This is by Juicy and it's $58.  The ruffles are good for adding a little to the bust line.

A little friend in MC's mommy group just got these rockin' shades by Baby Banz.  I like black.  They are classic and will work with any swimsuit.  They have a little strap so I won't have to worry about constantly adjusting them, which would definitely cut down on the chic factor.  You can look cool, too. for $20.

MC says the idea of wearing a swimsuit makes her want to play in traffic.  I don't know what that means.  

Although we still have a few months before our beach debut, she's pretty sure she'll be sporting a tankini or one piece, at least for the first part of the season.

Here is a hip tankini by Shoshanna.  The top is $145 and the bottoms are $58.  Remember when Shoshanna was like 12 years old and dating Jerry Seinfeld?  Me neither, because I wasn't born yet.

Tomorrow we'll talk about bikini's and cover-ups, although unless the Plastic Surgery Fairy visits, I'm pretty sure only one of us will be wearing a bikini.

Juicy Stroller Lust

Today Mommy Chick and I went to Macro Baby.  We decided to buy an Ergo carrier.  Because I am Super Model Tall now, I'm having trouble visiting the boobie buffet in my current sling.  Several fab mommies recommended the Ergo, so we'll give it a whirl and report back to you.  We opted for chocolate brown to bring out my eyes.  An added bonus is that our dog who sheds the most is brown, so maybe his fur can be incognito on this carrier.

Have I ever told you how much MC and I hate our stroller, uh, "travel system," I mean?  I have learned so many colorful words listening to MC load and unload it from the car.  Sometimes we leave the stroller on the porch after our walks, but so far, no one has taken the bait and stolen it.

I will give you a hint who makes our travel system:  It starts with "p" and ends with "eg perego."

Since I am big enough to sit in a smaller stroller, we are looking at options.  MC almost spewed her Starbucks when she feasted her eyes upon this beauty:

It is a Maclaren Baby Juicy stroller!  Supposedly, I could chill in it until I reach 55 pounds.  Here's the catch.  It's $450.  I'm thinking that might be a hard sell to Daddy Dude, especially since he wants to use our strollers for my future siblings.  He hopes I have a brother someday, but MC and I want a girl named Harlow, so really, we can't afford not to get this stroller.

We owe it to Harlow.