Showing posts with label Released Text Messages. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Released Text Messages. Show all posts

Friday, March 19, 2010

I'm Releasing Text Messages, Too!

So everyone seems to be abuzz about Tiger Wood's alleged (that's a fancy word that news people use so they won't get sued) mistress Joslyn James.  She made a website where she released purported (another "don't sue us" word) text messages from Tiger.

One of them is about him peeing on her.  I peed on Mommy Chick's Juicy robe last night, so I have no idea why that's such a big deal.  Maybe Joslyn (and MC) should learn to put the new diaper under the old one while doing a change.


Anyway, I'm hoping to increase my traffic, so I stole MC's phone and am releasing text messages from Daddy Dude.  

DD, if you are reading this, I will remove these only if you produce the Maclaren Baby Juicy Stroller by midnight Sunday.  And MC needs some Tory Burch flats for the park.  I think you'll make the right choice. (BTW, these flats are pre-order only right now)


Like Joslyn, we are omitting our response to these texts:

"About to walk out the door.  See you soon."

"It'll be 7:30 before I'm done tonight."

"How are my girls today?"

"Don't open the edamame."

"I have to run a VD errand. Be back soon."

"Did you download the gorilla video?"

"Easy with the threats."

"I was preoccupied with Ms. Thang."

Yesterday Joslyn's site crashed from so much traffic, so I apologize in advance if I crash Google with this post.  Hopefully MC and I will be at the park next week with our new loot.